Srry U Cannot Haz Plateletz

Although I've given blood many times, today was going to be my first time donating platelets.  I'd seen people having the procedure done before.  They were the ones sitting all the way in the back, watching House Hunters while fluids flowed out of one arm, though a machine, and back into the other ala Catch 22.  Donating platelets is not exactly the same as that sketchy plasma donation you did in college for extra pizza money, but the way they get the platelets out of you is similar, and it takes between 60 to 90 minutes.  Sitting around with a needle in one arm for the requisite 15 minutes to do a whole blood donation was enough for me, thankyouverymuch.

But then I got the card in the mail notifying me that my blood was in fact filled with an abundance of platelets and- if I wasn't using them all right now- the Red Cross would be happy to take a few off my hands.  Expect a call to set up an appointment.  And darn, those Red Cross volunteers are persuasive.  Babies!  Sick little babies need platelets!  (They never mention the fact that your donation is probably going to some drunk who got in a car wreck the night before).  I'm a total sucker for the sick little baby line.

And that's how I found myself sitting in the apheresis chair this afternoon, watching Monty Python and the Holy Grail with one arm "plugged in" and one arm being repeatedly jabbed by three! nurses who couldn't get a good stick.  After an eternity of "find the vein", I'd started to clot, but they'd taken out too much blood to start the procedure over again.  I was committed to going through with the donation if I possibly could, but they sent me packing with some of my red cells, three bandaids, and a pack of fruit snacks for my effort.

T-minus three days until I get another call to schedule a donation appointment...

Do you give blood regularly?  How about platelets?  Ever do a sketchy plasma donation to buy that cute dress for the party Saturday night?